The Jason Phenomenon

Nearly 21 years ago, a being was conceived. A being not ordinary by any stretch of the misunderstood word. Though environmentally benign, this being was to be a menace to himself. Yes, himself.
This conception was to be a boy, and intentionally so. His peace loving, fruitloop parents chose to breed in a position thought by the ancients to define gender. Under the light of a full moon conjucted by youranus. The variables of the conception, though specific, proved random due to a series of several thousand mistakes. The third world country of their residence was an ideal habitat for an airborne "phantom fungus" , a potent super depressant that when under substancial exposure acts as a retarder. The influence of the fungus coupled with hormones, subsiding drug residue, and aimless hippie zeal set the stage for a phenomenon.
Nine months later, the mucus plug was pulled, the cervix dilated, the bag broke, and the fetus coated with biolubrication became a baby. The wirey newborn nearly drowned an unsupecting doctor in half a gallon of urine.
Instantly he began to learn how to hurt himself. He found the rush of diving from his mothers arms to be especially gratifying. His ambition was matched only by the speed at which his injuries healed. His body grew strong dispite the constant abuse. Pain was wasn't potent enough a detterent. His fragile parents baffled by the blithe thrillseaker, wrote off his wreckless behavior as harmless deamon possesion, and encouraged him to focus his energy on dishwashing.
As he grew and slowly lost intrest in masochism, he enjoyed the thrills of the great outdoors, hiking, fising, hunting, and grew in his understanding of the ways of the redneck, still pain seemed to follow him like a menacing shadow.
As he aged he slowly inherited alzheimers, the very same affliction that crippled his warm-hearted mother. Dispite this indisposition, he found a new love, music. Music became his best friend, his mentor, and his inclination. He learned quickly, only to forget. Nevertheless, he continued to stimulate his creativity. As he immersed himself in his music, his last stronghold on sanity slowly began to wither in accordance with his astrological infuence. Finally the idealism that music taught led him to give his life for God, and Love. He became a missionarry. He traveled to Mexico, and volunteered his services as a construction worker.

Fate is kinetic irony. With precision and perfect designlessness, fate thumbed the pages of his book back to the beginning in order to create the perfect ending. For years the adrenaline junkie toyed with his own mortality, volunteering for the most dangerous jobs. He seemed to find a connection with God stepping the wet rafters like a cat high atop the roof as the lightning clapped. A peace that passes understanding. Peace, like a harness that only works when you let go.
One faitfull day, a summer afternoon, at the top of a beautifull pine Jason had completed the instalation of a light. For several weeks he had been climbing to the tops of poles and trees to install lights. Lights that would discourage thieves, as well as increase visibilty during the night. This day, though similar to previous days, was somehow different, and would prove especially so. He savored the country air seventy feet up just within the canopy of the mostly branchless pine. He looked down at his helper, Andy. Andy was a friendly giant, six foot four inches tall, weighing over two hundred and fifty pounds, and still growing into his large specifications. Jason smiled and said, "no mistakes this time" to which Andy nodded returning a king sized gum-grin. Jason was suspended by a sheet harness he had made himself, and two climbing knots that he learned from local construction workers. The knots were an ingenious inovation that he used to climb the tree, and with the harness he lowered himself via a one inch thick nilon rope thrown over a thick branch which acted as a pully. Andy held the other end of the rope and usually wrapped the rope around a tree or himself to create friction in order to control the decent.
Jason began to lower himself hand over hand, leary of Andy's self confidence. When Andy shouted, "let it go! I gocha", instead of letting go, Jason continued to lower himself, but Andy again insisted on having the job and his persistence finally paid off and Jason looked over his shoulder at Andy who appeared ready to support his body weight. Jason shouted, "Alright, You ready?" while he slowly and deliberately prepaired to let the rope go. "Yeah, I gotcha!" shouted Andy with full confidence. Jason let the rope go, and his heart sank as his fears realized, and his body plummeted, trapped inside the harness, his body bouncing from limb to limb. At first he struggled to grab ahold of the last branches of the trees canopy, but with his arms traped inside his hammok straitjacket he finally surrendered to gravity, and the unknown. No sooner had he defaulted to helplessness when he experienced a certain peace he had not known before, a fuller version. A complete and perfect peace. He closed his eyes and smiled as he cleared the canopy and began to free fall. Andy lay bleading and unconcious on the ground, rendered so, when a large pair of bullnose pliers slipped from Jasons belt as he tubled through the canopy. The moments of freefall seemed like a blissfull eternity. Jason cried at the though of Andys guilt, but nothing in the world could have tarnished his sweet peace. He thanked God for life, and the beautifull experience it is. Not only the joy, and the happyness, but he also thanked God for the pain. He thanked God for the sadness and the hardship he knew so well. He thanked God for the experience he would have never known, were he never born. He forgave, he forgave Andy for his carelessness, he forgave those who had done him wrong, but mostly he forgave himself. He forgave himself for failing so often, and for not being the man that he had imagined he should be. He forgave himself for the way he had hurt others so carelessly and stupidly. Blood and tears soaked his face as he cherished his last moments of life, his heart full of gratitude, and joy, not any typical joy, but a sort of tangeable joy, like a blanket he could roll himself up inside of, and never want a thing. It was finished and suddenly the falling sensation had stopped, he instead found himself standing beside Andys large sleeping figure, when from a distance he watched his own body break on the ground. He stepped toward it but didn't recognise it. His skin was torn and shredded from the branches that hit him on the way down. His neck was broken and his body convulged like a worm on a hook, but it smiled dispite the pain, and his eyes wide and full of happiness, continued to cry. Just then Andy woke, he screamed franticly, calling for help. The terror in his eyes seemed so unneccesarry. Jason knealed to the ground with no expression on his face and observed Andy who was franticly trying to revive the body. Andy was only seventeen and was held accountable for way to much. A scapegoat from birth and knew his share of hardship. He held his face in his hand and bawled like a broken man, no more confidence, no more defences, his pain was real. Jason whispered in his ear, and it seemed as though Andy understood, instantly he stopped crying, shouting "I'm sorry!....forgive me!", "Forgive me!...Im sorry!". The others arrived just as Andy had finished his scene. The confusion on their faces didn't make any sence, so Andy franticly reiterated the story choking and still crying. Somehow the others still didn't understand. A woman lifted his chin and asked with as much clarity as she possesed. "Where is Jason"? Andy looked down to the place where his lifeless body layed seconds ago. Andy shook his head in disbelief. "He was right there! I swear. What?!" The small croud that had gathered remained puzzled, but a search confirmed Andys story. Jason was gone. Andy sat on his bed for seven days, trying to understand what had happened. Maybe it was his imagination but the fact remained that Jason was Gone. The community also remained baffled at his strange dissapearence, and worried for Andys sanity. A week later Andy immerged from his room with a smile on his face. "I know what happened", "Jason's alright". "I know what happened". "He walked, just like Elijah he walked with God, thats why his body is gone". "He told me. I saw him. He told me, I swear. He told me that In exange of his forgiveness that I must forgive." "I think I understand."
The community though totally confused somhow understood, and to this day, In Hualtico Mexico, there is talk of a miracle. A miracle of forgivness, and this is the story of The Jason Phenomenon.

The odd things

I hate loose stuff, but im kind of a packrat. The other day my roomies and I cleaned up our abode. It sucked. I found all kinds of random stuff that has a use but only in its proper place. Pulled out this old suit case full of all sorts of superfluis crap. For Instance, a 11/16 wrench, a half broken pencil sharpener, a small bolt, an animal cracker, a toy monkey with a molten plastic penis (my personal creation), a picture of my nephew and his mother, a billion scraps of paper with half written songs, drawings, stickers, ideas, and school. A toenail, an eraser, a protractor, a picture of an ex, jamies nametag from the activated seminar, a bottle of pink hair color, a spikey cuff that had broken long ago, 5 year old glow in the dark and bannana flavored condems that I saved for a special occasion, and my elephant thong (a christmas gift).
The list could go on and on because there was tons of loose junk. Alot of it was stuff worth keeping, but I don't have the intellegence or patience to go through it all file it all away so I trashed it. The end.